Eve Annunziato

WHO ARE YOUR VIPs? January 19, 2009

I don’t make resolutions, rather I make annual goals. Nothing wrong with New Year’s promises – no judgment here. But, reportedly they have a less than 2% success rate. However, you exponentially increase your chance of success and personal growth by setting  goals. Personally, when I write down my aspirations and visualize my expectations, I’m more likely to achieve them. For 2009, one of my top goals is to live in the present, shelf my ego while maintaining work-life balance by focusing on my VIPs. I want to ensure my relationships with my Very Important People are a priority.  In times of busyness, I have tendencies  to shelf my relationships and focus on VDPs (Very Draining People) and VNPs (Very Negative People).  NOT ANYMORE.  Why put an effort toward folks that suck the life out of you and form only conditional, one-way relationships?

As all of you know, the effect of relationships in our lives simply cannot be overemphasized. When they are in a positive healthy state, tranquility is easy to find. When they go sour, stress, depression and even physical fatigue can result. Because it’s so important to foster our relationships with those with whom we care most about, our VIPs, we should purposely place a higher priority on them.

In The Five Love Languages author Gary Chapman makes a very pivotal point for relationships when he writes, “When your spouse’s emotional needs are met and he or she feels secure in your love, the whole world looks bright and your spouse will move out to reach his or her highest potential in life.” Right then, it hit me: It’s not just enough to think about how much I love my most valuable players in life, I have to make sure and tell them.  It’s a daily decision to put the needs of your spouse, children and best friends before your own. There’s a healthy way to love and be loved and to be intimate.  Quality relationships require patience, consistency and attention. Too many times, because the rest of life wears us out, we just don’t have the energy to put toward the commitment. In reality, you’re likely going to have to rearrange schedules, drop some activities and not commit to so many other things that keep you from putting your full energy into your family and other quality relationships. Studies have shown 85% of our joy is rooted through nourishing relationships.

Ask yourself this after a conversation with your loved one, “Did I make that person feel better or worse about themselves about their life?” After all, people are already besieged by doubt and surrounded by negativity that can incidentally be profoundly sobering. One of my top goals is to make certain that after every VIP conversation, the people I love, admire, and respect feel more confident about their situation – about their life. My husband’s program, the Life Barometer, is a great resource for growing healthy relationships.

Abraham Lincoln said it this way, “In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” So, let’s start putting some life back in YOUR years and love your VIPs with all of your heart and soul in 2009!


10 Responses to “WHO ARE YOUR VIPs?”

  1. Jenni Catron Says:

    Love your perspective on this Eve! I needed the reminder.

  2. Angie Says:

    Thanking you this morning for the timeliness of your words.

  3. @Jenni, thanks!! A great reminder for me, too!

    @Angie, you’re welcome. Thanks for reading!

  4. Pete Wilson Says:

    Great post. Love that quote by Abe!

  5. tam Says:

    i am 38 years old. and it has seriously taken me this long to figure out that the VNP’s and VDP’s sucked the life right out of me. i almost gave up entirely on friendships. dangerously close to becoming a home hermit. and as weird as this may sound…blogging changed all of that. there are still VNP’s and VDP’s in blogdom too – but i have found many VIP’s that have changed my life! and i love investing in them!

  6. @Pete, ya gotta love old Abe!

    @Tam, wow, isn’t it a relief when all of a sudden you have a VNP and VDP radar. Getting rid of the “friends” that bring you down is life changing and quite a blessing!

    Blogs are such a wonderful way to connect to amazing people like you!

  7. Megan Walker Says:

    Eve, wow! That is so powerful and I needed to hear it! Thank you!!

  8. Shonde Says:

    First blog I read after wakeup from sleep today!

    Search fast!

  9. Jillian Says:

    Great post, Eve! I can’t believe you have a blog…you will see I have one, too! This is great. It would also be great to all get together in Cape soon…but I don’t know how we would do it with our Dear Bebe too. We’ll see!


  10. Holly Black Says:

    You are an amazing VIP in my life! Can’t wait to spend time with you next week!

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